I deleted you off Facebook, Twitter, MySpace (if anyone still uses it) and any other social networking site, what do you do? Freak out? Go into a frenzy? Assume I hate you? None of the above.
Over the last 90 days or so I have done this with a couple of people, why? Because I not to deal with their drama that they pour all over social networks. If I cant stand your constant mood swings, constant emo posts and or your “advice” how people should live their life when you don’t follow it yourself. That is MY opinion is just that, MINE, and it doesn’t reflect any one else. If YOU choose to let it then maybe there are other issues that should be addressed. I will be the first one to admit if I deleted you off somewhere if you come to me and ask me, I won’t deny it and I will tell you why. My actions are exactly that, MY actions. I will delete people because I don’t feel like dealing with their drama or constantly complaining about how horrible their life is but they refuse to change it. Now, does that mean I hate you? No. Does that mean I never want to talk to you again? No. It simply means I don’t care to hear about your problems any longer so I clear you off my timeline/news feed. Now, I understand that sometimes people have a bad day or week, I do, trust me. But when it is constant negativity or arguments that you choose to start I refuse to deal with it.
Now, this is where the main concern comes into play. People have become so reliant on social networks to confirm a friendship with another person and that is just ridiculous. Do you wake up every morning and look at your friend count to see if you lost any? No. (If you do, please seek help.) Some individuals really depend on that to confirm a friendship with someone and I don’t understand that. Maybe someone can help me understand that? What did we do before social networks? We would pick up the phone and call our friends to see how they were doing, see what they have been up to and what , if any, plans they had for an upcoming weekend. We had communication, we spoke with our friends. I sometimes wish things were still that way because too many people have become reliant on a social network to confirm a relationship with someone. Now just because I delete you that doesn’t mean I no longer want to talk to you it just simply means I don’t care to be bogged down by your drama/sad stories/words of wisdom any longer on an hourly, minute or daily basis.
My Mom told me as a child that the quantity of friends doesn’t matter nearly as much as the quality and I stand by that 1000% percent. I rather have 5 really good friends that I can talk to about anything then 50 friends who don’t know a thing about who I really am. I am blunt, I have strong opinions and will voice them if it’s warranted, I don’t easily open up to people and when I do, expect me to be the friend who keeps it real with you. If you can’t accept me for who I am then you dont accept me as a friend.
Don’t judge me when I make comments that may or may not offend you, unless the comment addresses you by name then you should not be offended because obviously it wasn’t directed at you. I am who I am, accept it or move on.
It’s not the end of the world people when someone removes you from a social network, go back to the old times and use that old time device called a phone to call them and see what’s going on. Ask them why they may have deleted you, DO NOT ASSUME, a real friend will tell you the truth. One thing a good friend of mine told me in HS was that when you assume you make an ASS out of U and ME. Yes, this blog is directed at a few people who have assumed I hated them because I stopped following or unfriended them on a social network. Come to me ask me why, I would for you.
There’s a whole other world out there besides social networks, don’t let a “friend/follower” title be the end of the world for you.
-JD
